Mr. T's First Day as an International News Reporter

Mr. T's First day as an international news reporter
Scene 1

NEWS ANCHOR:
(to the audience)
We now go to International news reporter Mr. T at the scene of the Icelandic volcano eruption. (to Mr. T) Mr. T, what are the conditions on Mt. Erjulkiilahaa?

Mr. T:
It's bad here, fool!

NEWS ANCHOR:
(started at Mr. T's demeanor.)
How far is the lava from where you are standing?

MR. T:
The lava's over there, fool! (points behind him) And I'm tellin' ya, it better watch out! I pity the fool if it gets near me!

NEWS ANCHOR:
Are the villages around the volcano being evacuated?

MR. T:
Stop your jibber-jabber! The T is here!

NEWS ANCHOR:
(startled)
jib...jibber-jabber? I was merely asking...

MR. T:
(half looking at the camera, half looking at the volcano)
You know, you've got a lot of mouth, and I've got a lot of fist. I'm gonna shut this fool up for good!

NEWS ANCHOR:
(confused)
Are you talking to me or the volcano?

MR. T:
Who you think, fool?

NEWS ANCHOR:
The volcano?

MR. T:
(shouting behind him)
Stop erupting, fool! You're pathetic! If I ever catch you acting like a crazy fool again, you're going to meet my friend PAAAAIN! (waves fist)

NEWS ANCHOR:
(To the audience.)
I see we're losing Mr. T.

MR. T:
(shaking fist at volcano)
Don't you forget! First name MR, middle name Period, last name T!

NEWS ANCHOR:
(hesitantly surprised)
It looks like the volcano has stopped erupting. Stay tuned to News Channel 2 for more as this story and the mystery of the missing dinosaurs since the volcano started erupting, as they develop.

MR. T:
Shutup, Fool!!!