It's not me, it's you.

Men, men, men... I'm worried about you. When I look at you, you all look so distant and forlorn. What is wrong with you? Is it the sun; or lack thereof? Is it Portland or the Northwest? Are your boxer briefs bunching up? Was ist es? I don't understand how every single guy I see here looks like they're completely wrapped up in their own center of the universeness. No one talks to each other, no one smiles or nods at one another, everyone walks around with their headphones on and just stares at each other's shoes. I digress, this is a White cultural thing because I see the Middle Eastern and Asian people walk by one another and greet each other, but not white people. The Gay Boys are nice also (there's one I talk on the bus)! And this is a NW thing. You guys are so elusive that I honestly don't have the drive to pursue or even fancy a poke of my finger at your bubble. You're like the food that's in the fridge. You know how sometimes you open the fridge, hoping there's something edible in there, but end up making a face, sighing, and closing the door? It's the same thing. Some of you are expired, some of your smell weird, I don't know what you are, and just a few of you are probably yummy, but you take too much time to heat up or mix together... and I'm just not that interested. I'd rather order pizza. I love you all - don't get me wrong - I just have other things I'm interested more at the moment than you and your bullshit. I used to seek you out, to make friendly and share a laugh or two, but all of you have disappointed me so that I'd rather not mess with you right now. You're a hobby that I'm putting away. You're the drinks behind the bar, and I'm in AA. I'm not completely done with you, but I'm definitely putting you down for awhile. (Wow, that could be a great line for a song! Meh, it reeks of Country.)